Real women have curves

One thing that’s been really getting me down lately is how often I see people putting down one body type in order to raise another up. Comments like “real women have curves”, are commonly said with the intention of celebration more voluptuous women with fuller figures, however they imply that women with smaller body types are somehow lesser. Seeing as there is so much conversation about beauty standards, body positivity and body shaming lately, I thought this might be a good point to add into that discussion.

You can tell who the strong women are. They are the ones you see building one another up instead of tearing each other down.

This concept of a “real woman” implies that all other women who do not fit in to  whatever description we’ve been given. I think that anyone who identifies as a woman is a woman. Your body shape or size does not define your womanhood. What does define you (as a person) is the way you treat others. Whether they are big, small, old, young … whatever. Don’t put other people down. Think before you make comments about someone else’s appearance. Basically, don’t be an asshole.Real women have curvesThere is no singular “right way” to have a body. Whether you’re fat, thin, or somewhere in between; whether you’re smoothed and toned or have lumps and bumps and bits that wobble, you have the right to exist in your body. And if you have that right, so does everybody else.

I feel a little bit like that girl from Mean Girls right now. You know the one. Why can’t we all just get along?

The amount of times I’ve heard someone calling a woman a “skinny bitch” or a “fat bitch” behind her back. Or seen people online saying “oh finally, a real woman” when a plus size model or a plus size non-model is shown. Men are guilty of these putdowns but so are women, and I think it’s done in different ways. From my experience, men do it in a way that objectifies women, judging them on whether or not they’re “fuckable”. The example below is all too common – especially online where you can hide behind anonymity. Here’s a heads up: no one actually cares whether you want to have sex with someone (who you will probably never meet) or not. It’s absolutely unnecessary to make comments like this. Just stop it.

 

I have no problem calling your bullshit body shaming...

I have no problem calling your bullshit body shaming…

 

When it comes to women it’s a bit more complicated. Sometimes it’s jealousy, sometimes it’s insecurity, and it starts young. It starts even before we are teenagers, when popular groups are formed at school and they tease someone over their differences – weight, skin colour, hair, glasses … it’s just nasty. Sometimes these judgements are things we learn from our peers, sometimes it is things we learn from our parents, our elders. I know I learned a lot of what I thought to be true about my body from family, and from the emails I get I know that a lot of you are the same. So think about the messages you’re giving the kids in your life. Think about how you would feel if someone made nasty comments about your body. Think before you speak.

Do you have anything to add about “real women”? Share your thoughts below!

xo Meagan

6 Comments

  1. June 23, 2015 / 8:25 pm

    Yas! Love this! It disturbs me the skinny shaming and stuff within the body pos community too. great post meagan!

    • June 24, 2015 / 5:32 pm

      Thanks lovely! I don’t know why people feel the need to shame any body type, it makes me so sad – there is more than enough playground for everyone to get along FFS!

  2. May 13, 2015 / 12:09 pm

    Hey Doll, Love this. Love this so much. One of the things that I have come to really loath lately is the constant stream of “real woman have curves” imagery that seems to be popping up. I get it, its meant to celebrate voluptous woman. But it simply doesnt. It marganilises a whole other group. And thats the exact thing so many people are fighting against.

    I love the message here lady. “Just dont be an asshole”

  3. May 13, 2015 / 9:40 am

    This a million times! I wrote a post last year that had a similar message. Body shaming has always been something that riled me up, but when I saw how it directly affected my family it sent me into a tail spin! I’m so glad there are amazing babes like you in the world, Meagan xx

  4. May 11, 2015 / 10:57 pm

    love this. there IS no wrong way to be a woman, or to have a woman’s body 😛 no I just wish others would catch up with us 😉

  5. May 11, 2015 / 5:19 pm

    So true! There really is no need to comment on someone’s physical appearance.

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